Your cat is so beautiful! I laughed a lot reading you!
I'm a cat lover and I've got three of them. In fact they are a family : mother, son and daughter. One says that you never rule your house tour cat does and so it is with my cat family! They always have been respectful with my orchids as long as I manage some orchid free windowsill for them!
As I have an indoor greenhouse with lights inside, they tend to go on the top of it in winter and sleep there ...