The joke thread
Login
User Name
Password   


Registration is FREE. Click to become a member of OrchidBoard community
(You're NOT logged in)

menu menu

Sponsor
Donate Now
and become
Forum Supporter.

The joke thread
Many perks!
<...more...>


Sponsor
 

Google


Fauna Top Sites
Register The joke thread Members The joke thread The joke thread Today's PostsThe joke thread The joke thread The joke thread
LOG IN/REGISTER TO CLOSE THIS ADVERTISEMENT
Go Back   Orchid Board - Most Complete Orchid Forum on the web ! > >
Reply
 
Thread Tools Rating: Thread Rating: 3 votes, 4.00 average. Display Modes
  #771  
Old 02-14-2010, 09:38 AM
cb977's Avatar
cb977 cb977 is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Apr 2006
Zone: 9a
Location: Spring Hill, FL
Posts: 17,222
Default

A virile, middle aged Italian gentleman named Guido was relaxing at his favorite bar in Rome when he managed to attract a spectacular young blonde woman.

Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where he rattled her senseless.

After a pleasant interlude, he asked with a smile, "So, you finish?"

She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, "No."

Surprised, Guido reached for her and the rattling resumed. This time she thrashed about wildly and there were screams of passion.

The sex finally ends and, again, Guido smiles and asks, "You finish?"

Again, after a short pause, she returns his smile, cuddles closer to him and softly says, "No."

Stunned, but damned if he was going to leave this woman unsatisfied. Guido reaches for the woman yet again. Using the last of his strength, he barely manages it, but they end together screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed sheets.

Exhausted, Guido falls onto his back, gasping. Barely able to turn his head, he looks into her eyes, smiles proudly and asked again, "You finish?"

Barely able to speak, the beautiful blond whispers in his ear,

"No, I Swedish."


Reply With Quote
  #772  
Old 02-14-2010, 09:56 AM
trdyl trdyl is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2009
Zone: 6a
Member of:TVOS, AOS, FSoA
Location: Mountain Home, Idaho
Age: 57
Posts: 3,387
The joke thread Male
Default

Good one Sue.
Reply With Quote
  #773  
Old 02-14-2010, 10:27 AM
cb977's Avatar
cb977 cb977 is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Apr 2006
Zone: 9a
Location: Spring Hill, FL
Posts: 17,222
Default

Reply With Quote
  #774  
Old 02-14-2010, 10:41 AM
kavanaru kavanaru is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2007
Zone: 7b
Posts: 3,623
Default

LOL I will copy it and send it to my swedish colleague :-))) She will love it!

P.S.- She loves going to Italy for holidays... now I know the reason
Reply With Quote
  #775  
Old 02-14-2010, 10:46 AM
trdyl trdyl is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2009
Zone: 6a
Member of:TVOS, AOS, FSoA
Location: Mountain Home, Idaho
Age: 57
Posts: 3,387
The joke thread Male
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by kavanaru View Post
LOL I will copy it and send it to my swedish colleague :-))) She will love it!

P.S.- She loves going to Italy for holidays... now I know the reason
Reply With Quote
  #776  
Old 03-03-2010, 08:31 PM
flhiker flhiker is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Feb 2007
Zone: 10b
Location: South Florida
Posts: 3,667
Default

Redneck Fire Alarm
Now that's funny, I don't care who you are!!!!!

You never have to change the batteries!!! I'm putting one in every room! Safety First!

For those of you who can't see the photo it's a package of the old fashion stove top Jiffy pop popcorn hanging above a doorway.

Last edited by flhiker; 03-04-2010 at 10:06 AM..
Reply With Quote
  #777  
Old 03-04-2010, 12:12 AM
trdyl trdyl is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Aug 2009
Zone: 6a
Member of:TVOS, AOS, FSoA
Location: Mountain Home, Idaho
Age: 57
Posts: 3,387
The joke thread Male
Default

Dave, I'm not seeing a picture. I only see a white box with a red X in it where a picture should be.
Reply With Quote
  #778  
Old 03-04-2010, 02:32 AM
kavanaru kavanaru is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2007
Zone: 7b
Posts: 3,623
Default

I have received two similar e-mail at work, which I think are hilarious and with a lot of creativity... hier ths first one:

*************************************


What to do when you are bored at work..

1- Kill a few Flies (I prefer find a few dead flies to killing them)….

2- Put them under the sun to dry for one hour.

3- Once they are dry, pick up a pencil and paper... Let your imagination flow.

Here are a few examples...
Attached Thumbnails
The joke thread-image001-jpg   The joke thread-image002-jpg   The joke thread-image003-jpg   The joke thread-image004-jpg   The joke thread-image005-jpg  

The joke thread-image006-jpg   The joke thread-image007-jpg   The joke thread-image008-jpg   The joke thread-image009-jpg  
Reply With Quote
  #779  
Old 03-04-2010, 02:34 AM
kavanaru kavanaru is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2007
Zone: 7b
Posts: 3,623
Default

and here the second...

***********************


How to explain sexuality to kids and office nerds:
Attached Thumbnails
The joke thread-att00035-jpg   The joke thread-att00038-jpg   The joke thread-att00041-jpg   The joke thread-att00044-jpg   The joke thread-att00047-jpg  

The joke thread-att00050-jpg   The joke thread-att00053-jpg   The joke thread-att00056-jpg   The joke thread-att00059-jpg   The joke thread-att00062-jpg  

Reply With Quote
  #780  
Old 03-04-2010, 02:35 AM
kavanaru kavanaru is offline
Senior Member
 

Join Date: Oct 2007
Zone: 7b
Posts: 3,623
Default

and teh second part of the one above...
Attached Thumbnails
The joke thread-att00065-jpg   The joke thread-att00068-jpg   The joke thread-att00071-jpg   The joke thread-att00074-jpg   The joke thread-att00077-jpg  

The joke thread-att00080-jpg   The joke thread-att00083-jpg   The joke thread-att00086-jpg   The joke thread-att00089-jpg   The joke thread-att00092-jpg  

Reply With Quote
Reply

Bookmarks

Tags
belt, crackup, joke, nice, thread


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Pyrex and orchids: Blown glass thread MaestroMcD Orchid Lounge 14 06-02-2012 06:13 PM
Photo contest-Jan '11 - Chat Thread RosieC Contests & Polls 18 02-22-2011 10:59 PM
Starting a general Photography hints thread Ross Photography 72 08-26-2010 06:06 PM
updating thread VickiC About this board 7 07-22-2009 05:16 PM
update to thread "ORDERED!" VickiC Greenhouse Gardening 20 06-18-2009 11:28 AM

All times are GMT -4. The time now is 02:02 AM.

© 2007 OrchidBoard.com
Search Engine Optimisation provided by DragonByte SEO v2.0.37 (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2024 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.
Feedback Buttons provided by Advanced Post Thanks / Like (Lite) - vBulletin Mods & Addons Copyright © 2024 DragonByte Technologies Ltd.

Clubs vBulletin Plugins by Drive Thru Online, Inc.